LittleJohnnyIX

(Another installment in the series of stories I tell June from my childhood.)

A visit to Granmunnie’s house

When Little Johnny was about eight or nine, he would ride the train, the Central of Georgia, from Adel to Macon and go visit his grandma—he called her Granmunnie—who lived in Gray. (Georgia Gray, as Johnny called it.)

Johnny got to ride the train because Granmunnie’s friend Mr. Green was a conductor, and he helped look out for Johnny on the trip.

Granmunnie lived in a big two-story house right in the middle of Gray, and worked as a social worker for the welfare department in Jones County. Johnny loved the house, though the upstairs, especially the room that was always locked at the top of the stairs, was a little scary. One day he climbed out the window of the landing onto the little porch roof and slipped down to look in the window of the locked room. He was kinda disappointed, though, because there was nothing but boxes and trunks and old manikins and piles of clothes in the room. No skeletons or ghosts or anything exciting!

He also loved going to work with Granmunnie at the courthouse annex, but the “trusties” who did yard work and janitorial work around the courthouse were a little scary too in their blue and white striped uniforms.

Johnny would get to ride with Granmunnie to visit some of her clients out in the county, and they would often stop at a peach orchard a friend of hers owned and she would walk out into the orchard and pick a few peaches and then she and Johnny would sit in her old 1940s Chevrolet and eat them.

They would visit a man who lived out in the middle of a pasture in a little shack he had made out of old signs and cardboard boxes, and a family who lived in an very old wooden house that was teetering on top of piles of rocks on a little clay hill. Johnny would try to talk to the kids who were sitting on the rickety old porch, but they never said much.

Sometimes while Granmunnie was working in her office, Johnny would go into the little county library that was in the same building and lie on the couch and read. He loved reading books about dogs, like Big Red, and one of his favorite characters, Augustus, and he even read some adult mysteries, including a lot of Perry Mason stories. (The Darby Trial was one mystery, which he read because he thought it was the Darby ‘trail’ not ‘trial,’ and he didn’t understand much of what was going on in it!.)

He and his Granmunnie had lime sherbet with Bubble-Up almost every day after supper, and Johnny still thinks of her whenever he sees lime sherbet.

Granmunnie’s house had a closed well on the back porch, but she never drew water from it. There was an old shed and a storage building in the back yard, which was all bare clay with a few oak leaves scattered around, and Johnny would get a rake and run around the back yard pulling the rake behind him to make tracks through the leaves.

There was also a very old, one-room house at the very back of the lot, just across an alley that ran through, and a woman who occasionally would cook or clean Granmunnie’s house lived there by herself. The old house had an open fireplace in it and the woman did all her cooking in the fireplace. Johnny remembers the way the house always smelled like wood smoke, because there was always a fire, even in the summer.

There was an old, old car in the shed that Uncle Dan had bought when he was young—maybe it even worked—and Johnny loved to sit in it and pretend to drive. It had wire wheels and no top, and Johnny thought it was just about the coolest thing he ever had seen!

The house was very mysterious to Johnny, because there were doors at several places outside that went under the house, which was higher off the ground than Johnny was tall! The whole thing was surrounded by old rusted iron fences that had very decorative, pointy things at the top of each post and gates that opened up into the alley at the side of the house.

When the visit was over, Granmunnie would drive Johnny in to the train station in Macon for his ride back to Adel. She always packed him a nice little lunch for the ride, and he enjoyed looking out the window while he ate.

One time, he had just finished his lunch when the conductor came through with a large garbage can calling out to the passengers for trash. Johnny wanted to get his lunch bag into the can, so he quickly rolled it up and tossed it in.

Just as the conductor pulled the trash out of the train car and started across the clattering, scary platform where the two cars were hooked together, Johnny realized that he had forgotten that in the bottom of his lunch sack were about four of his favorite cookies—Nabisco sugar wafers—and he had just thrown them away.

He was so disappointed and sad that he almost cried when he realized the cookies were gone. But it was too late to chase down the trash and get them back! Little Johnny remembers that trip—and his Granmunnie—every time he eats sugar wafers!

Little Johnny VIII

Little Johnny and the grease trap

(A very funny one in the Little Johnny series, stories I tell June from my childhood.)

Once upon a time when Little Johnny was about four, he had a very embarrassing experience—one of quite a few, as he was a bit of a showoff as a little boy!

Johnny and his family were all visiting Aunt Sadie and Uncle Andrew in Pidcock, Georgia, one summer weekend, and all of Johnny’s many cousins were there, the McKinnons who lived there—Billy, Mabbat, Wallace, Phillip—and Patsy and Marilee, and Barbara and Little Bill, and maybe a few more. It was one of those family gatherings that happened a lot down in Brooks County.

So they were all playing outside that day, which is what they mostly did wherever they were, and Little Johnny decided he needed to show off a little bit.

“I bet y’all I can walk all the way around the top of that grease trap!” he boasted, knowing everybody would be impressed because nobody wanted to even get close to that grease trap most of the time. It was stinky and yucky and scary. It was just a little brick wall about a foot high that made a pool just underneath the kitchen windows that caught all the dishwater and trapped the grease (hence its name!) from all the dirty dishes instead of running it through the septic system where it tended to clog up the pipes and the drain field. But it was yucky!

So everybody poo-pooed Johnny’s boasting, saying they knew he wouldn’t get up on that wall and walk around it cuz he would be in big trouble!

Well, that was about all it took to make sure that Little Johnny was gonna do it, since they dared him.

Well, he stepped up on it, and they all gathered around oooohhing and ahhh-ing and taunting him even more. So off he stepped on his daring journey around the little wall. Except that about three steps into that journey, his foot slipped on that old crumbly brick and down he went, Plop! right into that stinky, greasy, yukky mess!

Of course, he started yelping right away and somebody went running off to get his mommy and he was trying to climb out when she arrived.

She was not very happy! She mostly just snatched him out of that mess and marched him around to the back steps by the ear.

“Stand on those steps!” she ordered.

So Johnny stood on the steps while Mommy hosed him down good with the garden hose, and she wasn’t too delicate about it either. She finally had to make him strip down to his underwear to get him halfway clean, and then she marched him into the shower—luckily, there was a shower room right off the back porch, because this was a country farm house and being dirty was pretty normal.

Johnny was not happy about getting hosed down, especially with all his cousins standing around laughing at him and taunting him for being such a showoff.

But we all hope that Little Johnny learned a good lesson from that grease trap! He sure did stay away from it for the rest of his childhood!

Little Johnny VII

(Another installment in the stories I tell June from my childhood and youth. This is a re-telling of one of her favorites – it’s also in LJ II along with the bike ride story.)

Little Johnny and the trestle

Once upon a time when Little Johnny was a teenager, he was driving his Daddy’s station wagon (that old 1956 black Ford) around in the countryside in North Carolina with some of his brothers and his sister and their friends when a scary thing happened.

They were just out “riding around” as they liked to do, but it was in the country around Lake Junaluska, and Johnny didn’t know much about the roads up there, since they were just visiting their friends during the summer. Bunny Anna, who had spend most of the summers of her life there, at least a few weeks every year, knew the area and she was helping Johnny know where to go on their ride.

One of the nicest drives around was old County Road, and they were just cruising along it when suddenly Bunny Anna said, “Oh look, here comes the trestle, speed up Johnny! It’ll be fun!”

So, of course, Johnny speeded up. Maybe a little more than Bunny expected! Because she started yelling, “No, no, slow down, I was just kidding!”

Well, Johnny tried to slow down, but it was a little too late, because he was going a little too fast and when they went under the trestle, he discovered why Bunny was yelling.

On the other end of the trestle, County Road made a pretty sharp right curve, following the mountain, as those mountain roads tend to do, and Johnny was going a bit too fast for that curve. He was wheeling the old station wagon around and putting on the brakes as hard as he could, but the car drifted right on across the left lane and onto the shoulder of the road! Johnny could hear the tires on his side of the car roaring in the gravel on the shoulder, and that’s when he looked out the side window. There was not much shoulder there, just a very steep bank down to the little river that the road followed, and lots of rocks and scary stuff.

Johnny was hanging onto the steering wheel and trying to keep the car from running off the road, and nobody was saying anything—they were all holding their breath and covering their faces to keep from screaming. It was lucky there were no cars coming the other way, and after a little while Johnny was able to slow down and get the car back onto the road.

He pulled over into a pullout on the cliff side of the road and stopped. Then everybody in the car started laughing and talking and being really happy that they didn’t just die, but Johnny’s sister, Linda, was so scared that she didn’t really like all that laughing. She was a very sweet, very good little girl, but it really upset her and she yelled out at everybody, “Y’all stop your damn laughing!”

Everybody got quiet all of a sudden, because they were all so shocked to hear Linda say that! You could hear some of them whispering, oh wow! Linda cussed! I never heard Linda cuss! and things like that. And then everybody started telling her how sorry they were for laughing and that she was right, they shouldn’t be laughing because they did almost just die!

After everybody calmed down, Little Johnny drove them all back to Junaluska, but he drove very slowly! After a while, they all kinda started talking again, but everybody was talking really quiet now, and finally Johnny told everybody how sorry he was that he scared them, and Bunny told everybody how sorry she was that she suggested for Johnny to speed up, and everybody kinda go over, but they never forgot it!