Life unfolds in often unexpected ways, and the recent developments in this world seem to highlight those uncertainties. My personal life has been very complicated in the past few years–well, always, really! But it seems especially so in the past several years of big changes, new children and new perspectives.
With all this in mind, I’m searching for ways to communicate with my children so that they will know how much they are loved and in what high esteem I hold them. Communication has been hard with all that has happened in our lives, and my youngest child may not even remember much of our time together, given my age and hers, so I’m beginning this new series of blog posts in hopes that it will survive me and be something they can all see at some point, if they’re interested. I have been thinking about this for a while now, and I’ve been trying to be sure that I’m doing this for the right reasons–which would be for their benefit. So that, should they ever wonder about my concerns and love for them, this record is here for them.
Most of what I plan to write here is from my journal entries over the years, plus continuing journal entries as it goes along. I hope to be able to figure out how to both add to the continuing story and do current journal entries and keep it all sequential here. (I think I will keep the posts on June & Marvin, my young children, in time order and drop in posts from the past journal entries on my other children.) I may do another set of Pages, which can be kept in numbered order. (I am creating a new Category for these Posts, ‘The children’.) It will be an experimental process… I will probably not try to keep the old journal entries in time order here. Kinda like the War Journal approach, with an exploded time line…
But I plan to begin at least with posts based on past journal entries, transcribed and expanded/edited as needed. My journals–of which there are quite a few!–are very erratic and confused, as I seemed to always be revising my approach to journaling. So it may involve a good bit of piecing together from different sources to make a coherent narrative.
It will, I hope, always be focused on helping my children live their lives and feel good about themselves.